Auto Correct

I’m quite thrilled I bought a smart phone
It has a camera and all the latest aps
and something called an auto correct.

It can see the word I’m writing
and finish it... yeah, right.

I sent a reminder to my son about his bicycle
He read, “Put your bisexual
in the garage before I get home.”

Later I sent a text to my daughter that her
Dad and I were going to Disneyland

She called back in a panic,
“Are you and Dad really going to divorce?”

To my pastor I texted, "Do you want anything
from Whore Foods for the carnival?"

To my friend I wished
her luck on her faith lift.

I sent the following message
to the company president:

To Whom It May Concern:
Your new technology is great,

but please do something about
your auto correct

it's giving me
a pancake attack.

I’ve invested enough monkeys
it should work better than this.

Sincerely,
Your Fried

examples taken from an e-mail from my husband